Are you a leader who surrounds herself with “yes” people? Maybe you’re a leader who counts on his like-minded team for advice. Or perhaps you tend to hire people who share your strengths.
It’s natural to be drawn to those whose views and skills are harmonious with our own, but the danger is that when those are the only options, we’re caught in an echo chamber, have an imbalance of skills, and can be blindsided by a reaction we never saw coming.
When I was a CEO, I instinctively sought those who brought something new to the table. I had little use for someone who didn’t offer their own perspective and merely wanted to stroke my ego. I also looked for people whose expertise would supplement and balance out my own. I didn’t want more “Amys” on the team; I needed people who could help me and our organization be and do better through their different skill sets and experience.
In essence, I was looking for those who complemented me, not those who complimented me.
Complimentary refers to expressing a compliment, praising, or approving. Complementary is about combining in such a way as to enhance or emphasize the qualities of each other or another.
The first is hollow and singularly focused; the second is stronger and more collaborative. It’s essential to understand the distinction and use our awareness to resist the urge to go with the former.
The smartest leaders intentionally surround themselves with complementary (not complimentary) people, and here’s why you should too:
COMPETENCE: It allows you to focus on your unique strengths
It’s impossible for a leader to excel in all areas. Rather than muddle through your weaknesses, hire or seek guidance from those whose areas of expertise differ from yours. This will free you up to put your talents to their highest and best use, increasing your competence.
CONFIDENCE: You’ll look like a better leader
Insecure leaders try to control every aspect and need constant affirmation; confident leaders trust and empower their teams. When you allow them to focus on their strengths, they’ll perform better and provide more value, which reflects favorably to you.
CANDOR: You’ll get what you need to hear versus what you want to hear
Surrounding yourself with a sea of “yes” people might help you feel better about a decision, but it does nothing to protect you from reality. A true advisor is someone who helps you see potential blind spots you’d otherwise miss, and that candor can only happen when they are encouraged to speak freely.
CURIOSITY: You’ll learn something new
If your inner circle looks and sounds just like you, you’ll never move out of your echo chamber. In contrast, leaders who seek out diverse ideas, views, and perspectives are open to and welcome learning from those who might hold opinions or experiences contrary to their own.
CONNECTION: It’s not about you
Leaders who surround themselves with complimentary people are most concerned about themselves; those who surround themselves with complementary people know it’s not about them. Servant leaders seek to communicate and connect better through an empathetic approach where they shift their perspective to put others first. Doing so helps them listen and better understand, which builds trust, strengthens relationships, and fosters camaraderie.
A version of this article appeared on forbes.com, posted on November 8, 2020
EXPERD, Human Resources Consultant, Jakarta – Indonesia